


Misconceptions

by zak194



Category: Pretty Little Liars
Genre: Angst, Drama, F/F, Romance, Scenes Depicting Acts of a Sexual Nature
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-23
Updated: 2017-06-15
Packaged: 2018-11-04 01:39:19
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 8,027
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10980672
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/zak194/pseuds/zak194
Summary: AU post S07E14, Emily turns her back on Alison in order to pursue a relationship with Paige leaving Alison to find comfort in the arms of another.





	1. Your Misconception

**Author's Note:**

> This does not follow the Current Track, It is completely AU, Characters will be slightly OOC (out of Character)
> 
> I wrote this in a rush, all errors are mine, hope you enjoy it! Please review and let me know what you think!

The shrill tone of the landline filled the Dilaurentis house, Alison was busy humming as she bustled about in the kitchen. She pulled off a bottle of _Cabernet_  Sauvignon from her wine shelf and laid it to rest on the dining table. She dried her hands on a kitchen towel as she made her way through the empty house, her dining companion would be home soon and a hearty home cooked meal of spaghetti bolognaise for two awaited them.

Alison smiled as she thought of the past few months, at first she thought it would be difficult to adjust to living with someone after spending five years on her own, but ever since she found out she was pregnant she had been glad for the company. Household chores, doctor’s appointments, odd-midnight cravings heck even driving to work became much easier with someone around and Alison couldn’t wait to thank her companion for all they had done for her the past months.

She had finally reached the telephone and was about to pick up when suddenly her heart clenched in fear. Call it intuition, or hormones, but Alison immediately knew something was wrong, that her family was in danger so in a panic she picked up the call and spoke

Alison: “Hello?’

There was a soft crackle on the other end before the caller had spoken

Caller: “Hello? Alison Dilaurentis?”

Alison gulped softly before continuing

Alison: “Yes...”

Caller: “Ms Dilaurentis, this is Stacy from Rosewood General, there’s been an accident...”

Alison could hear the woman talking as her surroundings blurred around her, words like _‘crash’_ , _‘red light’_ , _‘impact’_ and _‘driver’s side’_ swam through her head as she quickly took down the patient’s name and the doctor that was treating them. Once she cut the call she let out a hot sob as she grabbed her phone, her fingers trembling as she messaged her friends.

_‘SOS...Rosewood General...’_

When she had confirmed that the message had been sent, she grabbed her keys and handbag  and rushed out to her car. Once behind the wheel she took a few deep breaths to calm herself before putting the keys into the ignition, the engine soon roared to life as she rushed towards the hospital.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Usually the journey would have taken her half an hour, but somehow Alison found herself rushing through the emergency room doors of Rosewood General just twelve minutes after she had received the phone call. She probably broke every traffic law known to man in her rush but she couldn’t care less, all she needed to know was that _she_ was okay, that _she_ was going to live.

Apparently she wasn’t the only one who rushed over, she caught sight of Aria and Hanna rushing through the emergency room as she asked the nurse behind the reception desk about _her_

Nurse: “....The ambulance is on their way Ms Dialurentis...”

Alison: “Thank You”

She thanked the woman purely on reflex before making her way over to Aria and Hanna. The three friends shares a tearful hug just as the emergency room doors burst open once more. EMT’s, Paramedics, Doctors and nurses swarmed around the new patient and Alison could clearly hear every word being said

Doctore: “What do we got?”

EMT: “Car crash vic...female, early twenties..”

Nurse: “The other driver?”

Paramedic: “He’s fine, there’s not a scratch on him...”

Doctor: “there’s fluid build up in the abdomen. Severe contusions along the chest...possibly broken ribs...multiple visible fractures on the left arm, leg and pelvis...page CT, cardio and ortho and have an OR ready...”

The doctor was joined by a team of people and moments later they wheeled the new patient away to an OR. As they were being wheeled away, Alison caught sight of the woman on the gurney and lost her balance. The sound around her faded as she registered the face of the patient that was just rushed past her. She was about to hit the ground when she felt multiple pairs of arms hold her up. A nurse stood before her with Aria and Hanna were on her sides as they escorted her to a seat in the waiting room. Once she was seated, Aria began speaking intently with the nurse while Hanna rubbed her back soothingly but Alison could not calm down, Alison could not be reassured. All she could think about was the events that lead up to this moment, the misconception that could take everything away from her.

 

_*Five Months Ago*_

_Alison held the personalised necklace in her hands, her fingers playing over the beads as Emily paced the length of the Dilaurentis living room. The other girls had left for the evening, giving Alison and Emily privacy to come to terms with AD’s latest violation._

_It was weird, this morning she was ready to terminate this pregnancy when she found out she was pregnant with Emily’s child everything changed. Now she wanted nothing more than to have this child, to raise it, love it and nurture it together with the love of her life, her mermaid, her Emily. She smiled to herself as she imagined Emily and her raising their family._

_Emily huffed loudly, pulling Alison from her thoughts_

_Emily: “This is crazy! We can’t have a baby!”_

_Alison sighed deeply before she addressed the clearly freaked out swimmer._

_Alison: “Em...calm down...”_

_Emily: “Calm down? Calm Down! How do you expect me to be calm Ali? I have a child! AD stole and fertilised my eggs and impregnated you! I can’t....I can’t do this!”_

_Alison: “But...Em...”_

_Emily: “I can’t...I can’t have a child...”_

_Alison: “Em...Emily what...what do you mean?”_

_Emily: “I can’t do this Ali...I’m sorry...I just got back together with Paige...I can’t..I can’t have a baby with you...”_

_The swimmer then grabbed her bag and rushed out of the Dilaurentis home, pushing past someone in her rush to leave. The moment Alison heard the slamming of the front door she sank to her knees and cried. Seconds after her knees hit the floor she was engulfed in a warm embrace, long slender fingers rubbed soothing circles down her back and a soft husky voice filled her ears._

_Spencer: “It’s okay...shh...”_

_Once she realised that it was Spencer Alison began sobbing uncontrollably. Spencer pulled the sobbing blonde tighter into her embrace and spoke_

_Spencer: “Ali...Ali...It’s okay...I’m here...”_

_Alison wailed softly at Spencer’s words and through her sobs cried out_

_Alison: “But She’s NOT!”_

_Spencer glanced over her shoulder at the now closed door and asked_

_Spencer: “Who? Emily?”_

_Alison nodded slowly as she buried herself deeper in Spencer’s arms. Her face resting in the crook of Spencer’s neck and her arms wrapped around Spencer’s shoulders. The youngest Hastings adjusted herself slightly to make Alison more comfortable as Alison spoke_

_Alison: “Emily...she’d rather be with Paige...It’s silly...This morning I didn’t even want this baby...but now that I know it’s hers...”_

_Spencer smiled softly at this and finished the thought for her_

_Spencer: “You couldn’t bring yourself to get rid of it....”_

_Alison sobbed loudly and continued_

_Alison: “She said she wouldn’t leave me alone...this is her baby too...and I want to keep it...but she doesn’t wanna be with me....I can’t do this alone....I can’t”_

_Spencer: “You won’t be alone...I’m here...besides, we’re neighbours slash cousins slash somehow step siblings...I have a familial obligation to take care of you Ali...As long as I’m alive...you’ll never be alone...”_

_Alison sniffed softly at Spencer’s words, detangled herself from the brunette’s arms stared at the woman before her and spoke_

_Alison: “Thanks Spence...”_

_Spencer gave Alison her trademark lopsided grin before drying Alison’s tears._

_Spencer: “you’re my baby cousin Ali...I couldn’t possibly abandon you...”_

_Alison huffed at Spencer’s words before shoving her playfully_

_Alison: “you’re only three months older!”_

_Spencer: “And don’t you forget it!”_

_*End *_

 Pulled from her houghts by the sound of  a nurse clearing their throat, Alison glanced timidly at the nearby clock, it had been an hour since they had arrived at the hospital and Alison was slowly becoming restless.

_‘Will they be okay? what if they don’t make it? Does her family know that she’s here?”_

The nurse cleared her throat again and Alison finally turned to face the woman. She held in her hand a see through plastic bag and before she could tell Alison what was in the bag, Alison grabbed it out of the woman’s hands and began going through the items. Hanna thanked the woman for returning the victim’s personal effects while Aria held Alison, who broke down into uncontrollable sobs as each item was pulled from the bag.

Alison soon held in her hands a watch with a shattered face, a phone with a scratched case, a badly torn purse and a small fluffy teddy bear. Aria and Hanna watched as Alison stared at the teddy bear intently. It was adorable, fluffy, a nice mocha brown bear that was stained deep crimson. The nurse had told them that the bear was in the passenger side seat and had miraculously survived the crash, she then asked if she should have the bear dry cleaned but Alison sobbed loudly at this. The pregnant blonde hugged the bear tightly to her chest in a poor attempt to comfort herself, she didn’t care that she was staining her designer couture with blood, she didn’t care that she was seeking comfort from an inanimate object, all that mattered was that _she_  wasn’t there to hold Alison, and the pregnant blonde saw  the bear as a way to feel close to _her._

_‘whenever I’m in your arms,  feel loved....safe...protected...So until I get a chance to be in your arms again this bear will have to be a poor substitute...’_

_*Four Months Ago*_

_Alison laughed heartily as she pushed her shopping cart around the grocery store. She was busy doing her household shopping and Spencer decided to tag along otherwise coffee, siracha and beer would be the only edible things at the brunette’s loft. The brunette had just told Alison a story about some of her new co-workers and the blonde held her side with laughter as Spencer added a carton of milk and some cheese to each of their carts_

_Alison: “Seriously Spencer!?”_

_Spencer: “What?”_

_Alison: “What did you do afterwards?”_

_Spencer: “Well I just got the hell out of there...and vowed to never use that photocopier again...”_

_Alison: “only you would walk in on people having sex in a copy room...”_

_Spencer: “Well it was my bad luck...”_

_Alison: “What? That you got a free show?”  
Spencer: “No...that none of them were hot..”_

_Alison smacked Spencer’s arm playfully as they continued shopping. Turns out Spencer was an okay shopping companion, she asked Spencer to get things down from higher shelves for her and she fussed over Spencer’s dietary needs when the brunette made a few unhealthy choices. Spencer would not let Alison lift anything heavy or put herself in a situation that would_ ‘harm her or the precious cargo’ _so while Spencer was busy telling a store clerk to put up a ‘wet floor’ sign after Alison almost slipped and fell, an elderly woman stopped Alison and addressed her_

_Woman: “You are positively glowing...how far along are you?”_

_Alison stared at the woman surprised, before blushing softly. She cradled her small bump and responded_

_Alison: “About eight weeks...”_

_The woman looked at Spencer slightly and said_

_Woman: “I bet she her over protectiveness is driving you crazy...I’ve been watching you two for some time now...”_

_Alison stared at Spencer quickly before turning back at the woman_

_Alison: “Oh no...it’s not”_

_Woman: “You two are adorable dear...I wish you everything of the best...”_

_The woman walked away just as Spencer resumed her position by Alison’s side_

_Spencer: “What was that about?”_

_Alison smiled softly before replying_

_Alison: “She umm...she thought we were a couple...”_

_Spencer grinned childishly before quipping_

_Spencer: “Well we are two people...”  
Alison smacked Spencer’s arm playfully and chided_

_Alison: “No you goof! She thought we were together...”_

_Spencer: “I know Ali...I’m just teasing...So did you tell her that we’re not?”_

_Alison watched the old woman who now stood at the end of the aisle and sighed._

_Alison: “No...I didn’t feel the need to...”_

_Spencer grinned at this and said_

_Spencer: “Ah well...we need to finish up here, you have a doctor’s appointment in half an hour and you get really cranky when you sit in that waiting room for too long...”_

_Alison laughed at this and asked_

_Alison: “Can you drop me off my place afterwards?”_

_Spencer checked her watch and said_

_Spencer: “Sure...After your appointment, I’ll drop you off at your place then I’ll have about five minutes to change at mine and then I can rush off to this dinner meeting...”_

_Alison: “I hate that your new job has you working soo late...”_

_Spencer: “I know Ali...how about I get you that chocolate pecan pie that you like from that place in Philly on my way back?”_

_Alison smiled when Spencer mentioned the one thing she had been craving all day_

_Alison: “That would be lovely”_

_The two women failed to notice an enraged Emily Fields at the end of the aisle, the swimmer had clearly heard their conversation and a bout of jealousy had overcome her. This new found feeling was soon brushed aside when Emily’s girlfriend Paige pulled Emily away to pick out some fresh produce but just before she could leave, Emily turned to gaze at the woman carrying her child and a white hot rage surged through her when Spencer Hastings appeared beside Alison. Ever since Alison decided to keep the baby, Spencer had been stuck to the blonde’s side. Whenever Emily caught sight of the pregnant blonde, Spencer was not far behind. The lanky brunette had been driving Alison to and from work, around town and whenever she wasn’t by Alison’s side, she’d text the blonde to make sure she was okay. Emily found the entire display a little nauseating but she couldn’t deny the fact that Alison was happier than she had been in months and a small jealous part of her could not accept the fact that it was Spencer Hastings that brought the smile back on Alison’s face_

_*End*_

Alison turned slightly in the uncomfortable hospital chair, her back ached and her muscles tensed but she couldn’t bring herself to move. She heard Hanna and Aria conversing in hushed whispers beside her

Hanna: “Do you know what happened Ar?”

Aria: “Yeah...the nurse said it was a drunk truck driver...they ran a red light and hit the driver’s side...”

Hanna nodded slowly and cast a quick glance at Alison

Hanna: “Do you think she’ll be okay?”

Aria: “Dunno...but I hope they make it through this...”

Aria’s words rang in Alison’s head and the blonde slowly began silently begging every deity that would listen _‘please let her be okay...please don’t take her away...please...she needs to recover...I need her...’_

_*Three Months Ago*_

_Alison and Spencer found themselves reclining in Spencer’s barn after a wonderful dinner, the blonde was nuzzled into the brunette’s side as the fire roared in front of them. The cool spring night was filled with their conversation as Alison continued her story_

_Alison: “So...then you gently carried me to my bed and thereafter had your way with me...”_

_Spencer  smirked at Alison_

_Spencer: “So...was I any good?”_

_Alison laughed at this and teased_

_Alison: “You were amazing...you rocked my world...”_

_Spencer rolled her eyes at this and deadpanned_

_Spencer: “Your imaginary world...”_

_Alison: “Hey...for all I know, you could suck in real life...at least in my fantasy you’re a stud...”_

_Spencer grinned at this before adding_

_Spencer: “Thanks Ali...but it doesn’t mean anything...you’re in your second trimester now Ali...you’re hormones are in overdrive...”_

_Alison: “Yeah...that probably explains why I’ve been fantasising about you...sure beats the dreams I’ve been having about Emily...”_

_Spencer pulled Alison in for a hug as the blonde began to softly cry. Just as Alison became comfortable in Spencer’s arms once more a loud knock on the door had interrupted them. Untangling herself from Alison, Spencer checked her watch and muttered_

_Spencer: “Who could be here this late?”_

_She got off the couch and Alison watched Spencer’s back as the brunette opened the door, she could see Emily over Spencer’s shoulder and she sighed deeply and suppressed a sob when Emily called Spencer outside to talk.  The lanky brunette turned to face Alison and gave the blonde an apologising look before going outside to speak with the swimmer. The door wasn’t latched closed and Alison wondered why they had gone outside at all, since she could clearly hear everything that was being said. The two women were clearly having an argument if Emily’s harsh tones and Spencer’s growled responses were anything to go by_

_Emily: “What the hell are you doing Spencer?”_

_Spencer: “Spending time with Ali...”_

_Emily: Don’t toy with her...”_

_Spencer: “I’m not you Emily...I wouldn’t dream of it...”_

_Emily: “Did you sleep with her?”_

_Spencer: “What?”_

_Emily: “AD sent me a picture...the two of you...together, in Alison’s bed...”_

_Spencer: “What’s it to you?”_

_Emily: “I need to know Spence...”_

_Spencer: “No...you don’t...it doesn’t concern you...”_

_Emily: “It Does concern me!”_

_Spencer: “NO...it doesn’t ...it stopping being your concern when you walked away!”_

_Emily scoffed loudly and Alison flinched slightly when she heard this, she could tell Emily was angry, that Emily was about to say something that she would regret_

_Emily: “Ugh! You just can’t help taking what doesn’t belong to you!”_

_Spencer” Why do you care? You abandoned her when she needed you the most! You abandoned them Emily! So go...run to Paige...you’re not needed here...”_

_*End*_

Alison admired the loyalty the two women showed her that day. Both Spencer and Emily tried to protect her heart from each other that day and Alison couldn’t help but feel loved in that moment. Spencer and Emily may have had the biggest fight of their lives and it was over Alison. If she was a teenager she would have enjoyed the drama and the fuss being created over her but now as an adult, Alison knew that their friendship needed to be mended before it was too late.

Hanna tapped Alison’s knee gently, the blonde was kneeling before Alison and her action was pulling the pregnant blonde from her trance. Alison stared into the deep blue orbs of her friend as Hanna spoke

Hanna: “Ali...why was she out? Weren’t you two supposed to have dinner?”

At that question Alison began to sob once more. Hanna pulled her into a tight embrace as Alison choked out her story through her tears

Alison: “Dinner...Dinner wasn’t ready and...and I felt like having some chocolate macadamia ice cream...”

Aria had taken the seat beside Ali and began to hug her side as Alison sniffed loudly and continued

Alison: “....I told her I wanted some....and she...she went out to get it...I shouldn’t have said anything...I should’ve kept quiet!”

Hanna and Aria held Alison as she cried, the pregnant blonde clearly distraught

Alison: “It’s my fault...it’s all my fault...”

_*Two Months Ago*_

_It was a still, balmy night in Rosewood. Alison Dilaurentis stirred softly from her slumber when she heard a sultry voice talking to someone. Alison opened her eyes in panic, fearing that someone had broken in, but immediately relaxed at the sight before her. Spencer, who she had forgotten was staying over this week, was resting against her now slightly protruding barely clothed, belly. The brunette was clearly over caffeinated and still in her work attire. The youngest Hastings was deep in conversation with the unborn baby and Alison couldn’t help but eavesdrop_

_Spencer: “....Well...technically I could be your aunt...I’m you uncle’s sister after all...but I’m also your mummy’s cousin...then there’s Melissa...but trust me you don’t want to be related to her...I’ll draw you a family tree when you’re older...you’re gonna have to do it anyway for some class project so might as well get it over with...you’ll get an ‘A+’...that I guarantee...but you might be confused for the rest of your life...”_

_As soon as Spencer finished that thought she sighed_

_Spencer: “No matter what happens buddy...I’ll never let anything happen to you...”_

_Alison felt a warmth spread through her chest at Spencer’s protectiveness and her heart soared happily when she felt Spencer place a chaste kiss to the clothed portion of her abdomen._

_*End*_

The guilt weighed heavily on Alison as she sobbed bitterly in Aria’s arms. The tiny brunette held Alison in her arms and tried to reassure her.

Aria: “No..Ali...no..it’s not your fault sweety...”

Hanna: “Ali...it was an accident...you didn’t do anything...”

Before her friends could elaborate, Alison heard her name being called

Doctor: “Alison Dilaurentis?”

Alison pulled herself out of Aria and Hanna’s arms and addressed the doctor

Alison: “Is she?”

The doctor looked at Alison solemnly and said

Doctor: “I’m sorry....we tried our best but...”

Alison didn’t hear the rest of his words, neither did Aria or Hanna for that matter the three friends held onto each other tightly as they wept bitterly for their lost friend.

Alison was sobbing into Hanna’s shoulder when she heard Aria’s voice cry out

Aria: “Em...Emily...”

Alison could feel a presence around her and swiftly she broke out of Hanna’s embrace and threw herself into an outstretched pair of muscular arms, her tears blinding her vision, her heart breaking as she lost herself in dark tresses.

She sobbed loudly before she cried

Alison: “She’s gone...Emily...Spencer’s gone...”


	2. My Misconception

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alison has difficulty coping with her recent loss.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Authors Note (A/N): This does not follow the Current Track, It is completely AU, Characters will be slightly OOC (out of Character)
> 
> I wrote this in a rush, all errors are mine, hope you enjoy it! Please review and let me know what you think!
> 
> People have asked for more ‘Spencer and Alison’ so here you go! 
> 
> Warnings: Character Death,  
> This work contains scenes depicting acts of a sexual nature so reader discretion is advised. The scene is in bold and marked off so feel free to skip it if it makes you uncomfortable.

_*Rosewood-Dilaurentis Home-The Living Room*_

_‘As long as I’m alive...you’ll never be alone...’_

Those words and the husky voice of its speaker haunted Alison Dilaurentis. The pregnant blonde stared off into space, her arms wrapped around a blood stained teddy bear and her eyes filled with unshed tears. The blonde was dressed elegantly in black, mourning the loss of her best friend. It had been a week since the accident that had claimed the life of Spencer Jill Hastings but Alison still expected the brunette to waltz into the room bearing gifts and warm smiles.

Alison wiped at her eyes slowly and sniffed. Her grip tightened around the bear as she sobbed. Her voice cracking as she spoke to the night

Alison: “I had a doctor’s appointment today Spence...the first one that you didn’t come for...Dr Cochran asked me how I was...she conveyed her condolences...but I didn’t say anything...I don’t accept it, because...be-because...you’re not gone...you-y-yo-you c-can’t be...”

Alison cried bitterly as she held onto the stuffed animal hoping that the toy would comfort her in some way but alas, no such thing happened. Instead the, crimson stained toy fuelled a delusion within the blonde, a fallacy was created in her mind and the youngest Dilaurentis wanted nothing more than her misconception to be true.  Her eyes fluttered closed as another life flashed before her

_*Flash*_

_The shrill tone of the landline filled the Dilaurentis house, Alison was busy humming as she bustled about in the kitchen. She pulled off a bottle of_ _Cabernet_ _Sauvignon from her wine shelf and laid it to rest on the dining table. She dried her hands on a kitchen towel as she made her way through the empty house, her dining companion would be home soon and_ _a hearty home cooked meal of spaghetti bolognaise for two awaited them._

_Alison smiled as she thought of the past few months, at first she thought it would be difficult to adjust to living with someone after spending five years on her own, but ever since she found out she was pregnant she had been glad for the company. Household chores, doctor’s appointments, odd-midnight cravings heck even driving to work became much easier with someone around and Alison couldn’t wait to thank her companion for all they had done for her the past months._

_She had finally reached the telephone and knowing who was on the other end, she  sighed deeply as she answered._

_Alison: “Spencer...Spencer you called five minutes ago!”_

_There was a husky laugh on the other end of the line as the youngest Hastings child spoke_

_Spencer: “I know! I’m sorry Ali...they were all out of chocolate macadamia, do you want me to go to Philly and get some for you?”_

_Alison’s heart suddenly began to race._

_Alison: “What?? NO! Spencer don’t be crazy! Dinner’s ready and it looks like there’s going to be a storm tonight, just come home! Don’t worry about the ice cream...”_

_Spencer: “But...but you really wanted it...”_

_The blonde sighed at Spencer’s guilty tone. Spencer had given in to her every whim and Alison knew that the brunette would move heaven and earth for her if asked but right now the blonde was more concerned about Spencer’s safety than some frozen treat._

_Alison: “There’s chocolate ice cream in the fridge and some salted macadamias in the pantry... I’ll make do...just please come home...”_

_She heard Spencer mumble a soft ‘okay’ before saying_

_Spencer: “I’ll make it up to you Ali...I promise....Ali...I’m on my way home, love you”_

_The call clicked as it ended leaving Alison startled at the endearment that had been effortlessly spoken by the brunette, almost like it was second nature to Spencer to express her love for Alison._

_The blonde smiled to herself and played those words on loop in her head as she put the finishing touches on their dinner. Soon thunder clapped loudly across the night sky and lightening flashed across the air as the heavens opened and cast the city of Rosewood in an unbearable downpour. Alison’s heart clenched with worry for Spencer and slowly began to pace the length of  her living room. Soon the rumbling of a car engine pulling into her driveway put her mind at ease. She raced towards the front door as footsteps scuffled around outside. Heart beating erratically, breath hitching and face flushed with worry, Alison threw open her front door and threw her arms around the person just outside it._

_A grinning but extremely soaked Spencer Hastings held the pregnant blonde tightly._

_Spencer: “I told you I was coming home didn’t I?”_

_Alison, now completely overcome with emotion, kissed the woman chastely on the cheek and said_

_Alison: “I know...I just worry about you...and you know how I don’t like being alone....”_

_Spencer smiled at this and pulled out an adorable, fluffy, mocha brown teddy bear. The brunette held the toy up to the blonde as a ‘peace offering’ and quipped_

_Spencer: “I come bearing gifts...hopefully this makes up for the lack of ice cream...”_

_The blonde smiled down at the bear in her hands and said_

_Alison: “It’s perfect! Something to snuggle with when you leave me all alone...”_

_Spencer kissed the blonde’s forehead gently, looked deep into the woman’s cerulean orbs and said_

_Spencer: “As long as I’m alive...you’ll never be alone...”_

_*End*_

Those words leaving the brunette’s lips were enough to pull Alison from her reverie. The blonde felt someone’s hands on her and shivered. She was wrapped up in someone’s arms, the hands were cold, yet familiar. She craved the touch but for some reason was also repulsed by it. It wasn’t the touch she needed in that moment and for that reason she completely rejected it. She pushed off the person holding her, looked them in the eye and cried.

Alison: “GO!”

The person sighed deeply, ran their hands through their raven locks and straightened out their T-Shirt. The lean swimmer had watched Alison self destruct since Spencer had passed and was sick of it. Emily Fields watched her childhood crush and soul mate fall apart over another woman and her heart broke, not out of jealously but because her beloved was hurt.

Emily: “Ali...Ali you need to eat something!”

Alison growled at Emily’s words and yelled

Alison: “Don’t tell me what I need! I needed you and you weren’t there! You left me! You were GONE and she stayed! I NEED HER! I NEED SPENCER! BRING HER BACK!”

Alison stopped yelling and began hugging herself, trying to hold herself together as she pleaded

Alison: “P-P-Pl-please...bring her b-back...Em-Emily...p-please...”

Emily wrapped her arms around Alison and cried with the blonde, both of them in mourning for their lost friend but Emily had cried for another reason. Even though she loved Spencer and was deeply saddened by the loss of the brunette, Emily wept for Alison. The swimmer wept for the blonde’s pain and sent a silent prayer to the heavens.

_‘Look out for her Spence...I know you’re watching...you protected her for so long...please...keep her safe...’_

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

_*One Month Later*_

Alison was now six months pregnant, she was slowly becoming uncomfortable with her growing belly and swelling fingers and ankles. She felt unattractive and no matter how many times Emily had called her beautiful, Alison would never believe it.

Since Spencer’s passing, Emily had broken up with Paige and all but moved in to the Dilaurentis home with Alison and even though the blonde knew this was out of guilt, Alison couldn’t bring herself to care. She was glad for the company, she had grown accustomed to having Spencer around and really didn’t want to be alone in the huge house she lived in so now, with Spencer gone, Emily was the least objectionable substitute.

Alison stared at herself in the full length mirror of her master bedroom. Her eyes raking over her body, clad only in a red silk bra and matching underwear, Alison began massaging her protruding abdomen. She stared into the mirror and smiled lovingly as her mind created the image of an arm snaking around her abdomen, the sense of a person standing behind her was conjured and she almost felt hot breath against her neck as her companion’s cleft chin rested against her shoulder.

She held their gaze through the mirror, blue eyes met brown and Alison moaned as the hand on her abdomen began wandering lower.

Alison: “Mmmh...Spence...”

The apparition of Spencer Hastings smirked, kissed the column of Alison’s neck gently as she murmured

_Spencer: “Beautiful...”_

Her mind began to wander, a dangerous activity that she would often indulge in. She needed to lose herself in her fallacy once more, because her mind couldn’t come to terms with the reality that she lived in. She preferred to live in her misconception, were platonic feelings became something more because in her fallacy she felt sexy, she felt attractive, she felt...loved.

_*Flash*_

_Alison gently turned around and cupped Spencer’s face in her trembling hands and kissed the brunette soundly. Slowly her arms rested atop Spencer’s shoulders as Spencer snaked an arm around Alison’s waist, pulling the pregnant woman closer to her. Spencer broke the kiss and in breathy tones spoke to the blonde_

_Spencer: “Ali...are you sure?”_

_Alison nodded fervently and reattached her lips to Spencer’s, kissing the youngest Hastings passionately as she slowly began removing the woman’s clothes. Spencer’s hand had ventured beneath her protruding abdomen before wondering to her clothed sex. Spencer smirked against Alison’s lips as she gently rubbed Alison through the fabric, causing the blonde to moan loudly in anticipation._

_Alison: “mmmh...Spence....don’t tease...”_

_The brunette removed her hand quickly and broke the embrace she shared with the blonde. Seconds later she stood beside the pregnant teacher and lifted the woman into her strong hold. Alison smiled shyly and admired Spencer’s strength as she was carried bridal style to her king sized bed. She felt safe in Spencer’s strong arms, she was content in the gentle grip and she felt protected as she rested her head against Spencer’s chest._

_Soon she felt her body hit the softness of her mattress and she grinned gleefully as Spencer discarded her shirt, giving the blonde a clear view of the lobbyist’s toned body. Alison sighed deeply as Spencer gently settled herself on top of her, the brunette resuming their kiss as her hand made its way back to Alison’s clothed sex._

** (Mature content ahead) **

**_Alison felt like a horny teenager, needing Spencer to give her release hard and fast but Spencer was gentle with Alison, the brunette’s long fingers teasing her through the silk fabric of her underwear before pushing the garment aside and inserting a finger into Alison’s dripping sex. Alison groaned as she felt a moist finger part her wet folds at the juncture between her legs and insert itself into her core moving in a gentle ‘to-and-fro’ movement to create a tempo that drove her crazy. The blonde was wet, ready and eager for release but the sensual torture was to last a little while longer when another finger was added into the sexual frenzy._ **

**_Alison moaned pleasurably at the intrusion and began to slowly buck into the brunette’s hand, rocking herself gently as Spencer pumped into her. Slowly the brunette added another finger heightening the blonde’s stimulation and if Alison’s pants and moans were anything to go by, it was as clear as day that the blonde was enjoying herself. She wrapped her arms around Spencer’s neck, turned the taller woman’s head up and gazed longingly into Spencer’s chocolate orbs as she faced her._ **

**_Alison: "Uhhhn...Spence....mmmh...please....”_ **

**_Spencer began moving faster, increasing her tempo, driving Alison over the edge but just before the blonde could find her release, Spencer smirked evilly and had slowed down taunting the former queen bee, the brunette was asserting her dominance by making Alison beg for her satisfaction. Alison ground herself against Spencer’s talented fingers eagerly trying to find her release but clearly Spencer had wanted to take her time. The brunette removed her fingers from Alison’s folds and smirked at the blonde before sucking her digits clean. Alison groaned at the sensual sight before her and closed her eyes to calm herself, but Alison was not given any reprieve because just as the fingers were removed from her folds a feeling of wetness had began to stimulate her once more. Alison felt Spencer’s strong jaw rest against her inner thighs as her core received a tongue lashing. Her body began to convulse in pleasure as she found her first release._ **

**_Alison’s eyes rolled back into her head and as she moaned deeply_ **

**_Alison: “God! Spencer!....Yesss....Just like that...”_ **

**_Her eyes snapped open as her second climax hit her, she stared at the room’s pristine white ceiling for a while as her sexual partner continued her oral assault on Alison’s core causing the blonde to pant and writhe hotly against the soft bed sheets. Alison’s heart raced as she found her bountiful release, the blonde was sure that the sheets beneath her was ruined but she couldn’t bring herself to care. Finally once she had ridden out her orgasm did she look down to see the woman who had given her such pleasure and she gazed lovingly at Spencer, who was smiling proudly and punch-drunk on Alison’s nectar_ **

**  (End of Mature content) **

_Slowly Spencer kissed up the expanse of Alison’s body before dropping to the blonde’s side, grinning happily. Alison felt Spencer wrap her arms around her and the blonde snuggled closer to the brunette, resting her head against Spencer’s chest in a post-coital cuddle as Spencer placed a gentle kiss on Alison’s temple._

_A voice filled the air as her name was called_

_Voice: “Ali?”_

_Alison knew that voice, her heart told her that the voice belonged to her soul mate, to her Emily but Alison ignored it, the blonde preferred the arms of the woman her mind had conjured up and refused to leave her fantasy._

_Emily’s voice called out to her again, gently pulling her away from the apparition of Spencer that was reclining against her_

_Emily: “Alison...”_

_Alison looked up at Spencer and pouted_

_Alison: “I don’t want to leave...”_

_Spencer smiled down at her and gently addressed the blonde_

_Spencer: “You have to...you belong with her Alison...”_

_Alison stared at Spencer curiously_

_Alison: “I don’t belong to anyone Spence...not anymore...”_

_Spencer kissed Alison’s temple gently, a reassuring tone tinged her voice as the brunette spoke_

_Spencer: “You belong with Emily...”_

_*End Flash*_

At the mention of the swimmer’s name, Alison felt a sharp tug in her heart. Her world began to spin and her vision became unfocused. She shook her head to clear it and gasped in shock at what she saw.

Alison was standing in her bedroom before her full length mirror, clad in a red silk bra and matching underwear. She head Emily call her name from down the hall but she ignored the swimmer and quickly she turned around, gazed at the bed behind her and pinched herself to make sure that this was real.

The lack of an unkempt bed and the heady scent of sex in the air told Alison that she had once again lived in her fantasy. Doctor Sullivan had cautioned her about getting ‘lost’ in these day dreams but Alison couldn’t help it, it was the only way she could see Spencer again and the blonde would rather be lost forever than face a world without the brunette by her side.

She heard Emily’s voice call out to her again and Alison quickly grabbed the clothes that were strewn across the floor and hurriedly put them on. She had just smoothed down the front of her maternity dress when Emily walked into the bedroom with a smile.

Emily: “Breakfast is ready...”

Alison gave her a sullen smile and headed past the swimmer and towards the kitchen. Just as she passed the swimmer, her mind created a new way of torturing her when she heard the husky voice of her deceased friend whisper to her

_Spencer: “She’s trying Ali...forgive her...”_

Alison growled out a harsh _‘no’_ before stalking off to the kitchen, leaving a bewildered Emily behind.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

_*Seven Months into Alison’s pregnancy*_

Alison sat beside Emily at the dinner table, pushing the food around her plate instead of just eating it. The visions of Spencer created by the blonde’s mind became a regular occurrence now and currently the apparition of her dearly departed friend was sitting across from her and watching her with a pronounced frown.

_Spencer: “Alison...you need to eat...”_

Just as the words left the apparition’s lips, Emily raised her head and turned to face Alison, the swimmer wore a concerned expression and her tone hitched with worry.

Emily: “Ali! You need to eat!”

Alison rolled her eyes at Emily’s outburst and continued to stare at the ‘ghost’ of her brunette friend seated across from her

_Spencer: “She’s right you know...:_

Emily sighed at Alison’s actions and said

Emily: “Alison please....for me?”

Even though she still harboured a residual resentment towards the swimmer for abandoning her, Alison still brought a spoonful of food to her lips and proceeded to partake in the meal, her action causing the phantom across from her to chuckle deeply as the brunette teased her.

 _Spencer: “Of course you’d listen to Emily...I’ve been begging you to eat for the past half hour but all Emily needs to do is bat her eyelashes at you and you’re a goner...”_  

Alison growled lowly at Spencer’s words, the action caused Emily to worry about the blonde. So, purely out of concern for Alison’s health the swimmer turned Alison to face her and asked

Emily: “Ali...Ali are you okay?”

Even though they had been living together for the past few months, Alison had not fully welcomed Emily into her life. She was still distant and often cold with the swimmer which resulted in the taller woman adopting a sense of hesitation every time she found herself in a room with Alison. 

Alison stared up at Emily in anger. Alison didn’t even know why she was angry, she didn’t even know if it was Emily she was angry with but she needed to lash out.

Alison: “NO! No I’m not _okay_ Emily!”

Emily looked taken aback by her sudden outburst but Alison didn’t care that she was being harsh. Emily cleared her throat and tried to speak with Alison once more

Emily: “Ali...I’m worried about you...”

At Emily’s words, the apparition of Spencer spoke up, causing Alison to stare at her

_Spencer: “I’m worried about you too Ali...”_

Alison growled in frustration and slammed her fists against the table

Alison: “I don’t need a babysitter Emily!”

 She stood up abruptly and  growled at the apparition of her deceased friend

Alison: “And you...stop taking her side!”

Emily followed Alison’s gaze to the empty chair across from them. Fearing for Alison’s sanity, Emily asked

Emily: “umm...Ali? Who are you talking to?”

Alison turned to face Emily and stated, as though it was the most obvious thing in the world

Alison: “Spencer”

Emily stared up at Alison in shock and was contemplating what to say when Alison heard _Spencer_ address her

_Spencer: “Ali...you need to forgive her...”_

Alison huffed at this and stubbornly grit out

Alison: “No...no I don’t”

The apparition of Spencer sighed, pinched the bridge of her nose and spoke to the blonde

_Spencer: “Ali...you need to let me go...you need to move on, this is not healthy...for you and your baby...Emily’s baby...You love her and she loves you so please, let her be there for you...”_

Tears filled Alison’s eyes and slowly the woman began to silently cry. At the sight of tears pooling in Alison’s eyes, Emily stood up and wrapped her arms around a weeping Alison but Alison paid no attention to the swimmer, she focused on the phantom in front of her and spoke, her voice small...defeated...

Alison: “I want you to be there for me Spence, Emily ran when I needed her the last time....”

Emily’s heart sank at Alison’s words which caused the apparition of Spencer to smile at the blonde sadly as she spoke

_Spencer: “Ali...Emily’s there now...she’s trying but if you keep pushing her away she’ll give up on you...forgive her Ali...she made a mistake, just like you did when you abandoned her in our junior year...but she forgave you for that...she loves you Ali and I know you love her...don’t lose her over something so trivial...”_

Alison sighed and contemplated _Spencer’s_ words  before slowly nodding in agreement.

Alison: “You’re right Spence...”

 _Spencer_ smiled at Alison cheerfully and quipped

_Spencer: “I know...now that you’ve admitted it I can rest in peace...”_

Alison watched as the apparition of her deceased friend vanished before her eyes, her heart clenched in fear and she called out frantically

Alison: “SPENCER! SPENCER COME BACK!”

Emily pulled Alison deeper into her embrace as Alison trashed against her. The swimmer knew that Alison was finally coming to terms with the brunette’s passing and let the blonde cry in her arms.

Alison: “She’s gone Em...”

Emily rubbed soothing circles on Alison’s back as the woman bitterly sobbed against her

Emily: “I know Ali...”

Alison: “I miss her...”

Emily: “I miss her too...”

Alison: “She wants me to forgive you...I think I forgive you Em...”

Emily smiled at this and kissed Alison’s temple gently

Emily: “Thank you Ali...I promise, I’ll never abandon you again...”

Alison smiled sadly and hugged Emily tighter, the warmth from the swimmer’s embrace filling her with a sense of optimism, she had been in the darkness for too long and she finally accepted Emily to be her guide back into the light

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

_*Five Years Later- Rosewood Cemetary*_

Alison Dilaurentis rested against the cool granite of the exquisitely carved headstone. The fresh flowers she placed on the earth atop of the grave joined the large number of bouquets that huddled around Spencer Hastings’ grave stone.

The blonde could tell who had come to visit the brunette by the flowers that were before. Spencer’s parents had brought by the azaleas and Alison suspected that Veronica Hastings had created the arrangement from the flowers growing in the Hastings’ backyard. Hanna and Caleb had brought by the multicoloured freesia arrangement, Aria had brought the sunflowers, the butter cups were from Jason and Mary, Melissa had given the peonies and Toby had obviously brought the Red Roses.

Alison smiled to herself as she laid the arrangement of pink and peach roses against Spencer’s head stone and began to speak to the brunette

Alison: “I haven’t seen you in a while...Sure I visit you every month but I haven’t seen you...I miss you...I miss your smile, your fierce way of protecting me...I can’t thank you enough for being there for me in the early days of my pregnancy. If it weren’t for you, I would have eventually lost the baby because of some careless mistake and I would never have my baby boy.... Aiden Wayne Dilaurentis...yeah I know _‘_ Spencer’ is a unisex name and I know you probably mad that I didn’t name his after you but I’m saving the name for my next little one...yeah I know...I’m pregnant again! The IVF treatment I told you about last month worked and I hope we have a little girl...I already told Emily that I’m naming the child after you and she’s thrilled with the idea.”

Alison began to trace the engraving of Spencer’s name, her fingers brushing against the cool stone as she traced the letters carved into it. She bit back a sob and wiped at the few tears gathering in her eyes as she pulled out a sheet of paper from her pocket and spoke

Alison: “....Aiden had to draw a family tree for his class project this week...”

Alison couldn’t help the tears that fell from her eyes as she became lost in the memory of a late night whispered conversation between her now deceased friend and her then unborn child. She sniffed loudly and continued her story

Alison: “....when he told Emily and I that he needed to draw a family tree while we were having dinner I broke down...when he asked me why I was crying, I told him about you...about that night... he wanted me to thank you for taking care of his mummy....”

Alison wiped away the tears that were now streaming down her face and spoke

Alison: “....it doesn’t feel right without you...sure we all meet up but it doesn’t feel the same with you being gone. I know Aria told you all about the book tour she’s going on with Ezra, that Hanna and Caleb visit you whenever they’re back from New York and that Emily told you all about the promotion she received...we all still confide in you Spencer but you’re not with us anymore...sure, we all get together for dinner whenever all of us are in Rosewood and even though it’s a room full of smiles and laughs we’re all hurt by your absence...you took care of us when we needed you to, when I was gone you stepped up and held our group together through all the drama that ‘A’ had put you through and then when I got pregnant you stood by me when I thought I had no one....I can’t tell you how much I appreciate having you in my life Spence.....”

Alison laid her palm to rest against the cool headstone and began to cry bitterly as she choked out a familiar quote.

Alison: “How lucky am I to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Authors Note (A/N): Well...what did you think?   
> Regarding the intimate Scene between Alison and Spencer, there have been some complaints (which I can’t understand since something like it was alluded to in Chapter 1) so I just wanted to set the record straight. The mindset in which Alison was in at the time was one where she is:-  
> 1\. Highly hormonal (any horny) due to her pregnancy);  
> 2\. Grieving the person who stood by her (Spencer); and  
> 3\. Harboring residual anger towards the person who she believes abandoned her (Emily).   
> This entire chapter was about how Alison felt guilty for Spencer’s death and is grieving the loss of her close friend and because of her grief, she is unhealthily projecting certain feelings and emotions onto Spencer. I maintain that Spencer and Alison were platonic because they had never slept together while Spencer was alive. The scene in question was just to show that Alison needed to feel close to Spencer.

**Author's Note:**

> Well...what did you think? I know it’s not really ‘Emison Gold’ but I tried


End file.
